The discomfort of change and finding meaning in upheaval
Hi hi lovely people! How are you? In case you’re reading this for the first time (in which case, hello!), I write a weekly post with snippets from my world of coaching, meditation and breathwork. My intention is to share useful, joyful or interesting tidbits, which may serve you in some way.
So! *drum roll* here are five inspiring things from my world of coaching, meditation and breathwork this week:
1. Song of the week
Pink Moon by Nick Drake (Spotify and YouTube)
I happened to see the home of British folk star Nick Drake last weekend in the ancient village of Much Wenlock, as I visited the stunning ruins of Wenlock Abbey. I shared this beautiful song, Pink Moon, at the end of an in-person breathwork session, and you could feel the warmth in the room as people’s hearts opened.
2. Quote of the week
“We’re taught to be ashamed of confusion, anger, fear and sadness, and to me they’re of equal value to happiness, excitement and inspiration.” – Alanis Morissette
At the Wayward Sisters masterclass this week, my friend and co-host Kirsty Hulse shared her experience recently of feeling sad. She asked herself: what would help her process this sadness right now? And the clear desire was to drink whisky, listen to Alanis Morissette and cry on her sofa. And she found it so damn healing! I am a big fan of emotional expression and exploring deeply our confusion, anger, fear and sadness. They are all such valuable emotions! Catch the free 60-minute replay of the Wayward Sisters masterclass here.
3. Practice of the week
Sleep! Have you ever thought of sleep in this way? As wellbeing practice? It’s so fundamental to our health and wellbeing. I try to practice good sleep hygiene; for example, I try to stop looking at my phone an hour before bed, I have a Lumie alarm clock (so my body wakes up with the light), I drink plenty of water before sleep, I try not to watch anything too stimulating before sleep (e.g. any violent films), I keep my phone charging away from my head, my phone has a night filter to stop blue light after 9pm, I journal before bed and do some nose breathing if I am feeling tense. You get the idea! I also mouth tape at night. Do you mouth tape too? Drop me a reply if yes! Check out more on mouth taping here.
4. Article of the week
‘You still have time‘ by School of Life.
If you’re not familiar with the School of Life (sounds rather cultish, eh!), bookmark their FABULOUS YouTube channel. They have brilliant content around life, drawing on philosophy, psychology, art, science, literature and more. This article on the School of Life website struck a chord with me. At some point last year, a though floated through my mind: “Am I just rearranging furniture on the Titanic?”
Finding meaning during times of upheaval are ways in which we can dig deep and unveil other layers to life. What is really important? What should I focus on in life? What is in my control? What should I let go of? And can I forgive myself for what has been? And open up to what is here? All questions that have come up for me during the pandemic. And trusting that I still have time. And all that matters is this moment, right here. This moment matters.
5. Client win of the week
The discomfort of change.
As you grow and expand, your relationships, passions and hobbies may change too. This has been coming up a lot for my coaching clients recently. The shaky unfamiliar ground of a new YOU emerging! How do you know you’re really shifting and growing? One tell-tale sign is that what once brought you joy, or the things that once felt good may no longer “do it for you”… This shift can feel a bit scary or isolating.
This is an insight a client shared with me this week. She felt out of place being with old friends. She’d stopped drinking and partying so much and didn’t know how to relate to them any more. As more of her authentic self was emerging, she felt anxious in old friendship groups. We explored those feelings more. Deep down, there was a fear of not being accepted by them, as more of her true self emerged. But she didn’t want to keep giving energy to an old version of herself in order to fit in. It’s a tricky place to find yourself in!
This is a classic stage to move through when growing and expanding in life. A simple rule I follow during these confusing, unnerving times of growth is this: “Contraction is fear, and expansion is love”. What creates feelings of expansion for you? Do more of that! And trust trust trust yourself and the process. Be curious about your feelings. And know that it’s OK to change.
Have a fabulous weekend!
Big love!
Briony x
